I knew I had a serious problem when I daydreamed that when my portfolio reached X I was finally going to tell off Y family member for good, relocate, etc.
At parties I frequently look for a moment to sneak out to check my portfolio or count the minutes till I get back to my crypto pc, or quietly hold my tongue when people begin to talk for hours about trivial bullshit while complaining about their work and lives.
So here I am at 3am doom scrolling, am I happier now? Feedly, Google, and Reddit for news about the infrastructure bill. Firing off comments. I dont even have any social media, but here I am, publishing for you. Yet the last 6 hours of reading felt more productive and satisfying than being with the petty ass people in my life.
I wasn't like this before, but I had other addictions like drinking. I went from being destructively oversocial to antisocially destroying my health faster with a lack of sleep. I used to play videogames and now I find 99% of them pointless or less of an adrenaline rush than trading.
The thing is, I dont know how to stop. But man, Im well on my way to retirement in such a short amount of time, if my anxiety over the markets doesnt kill me first.
Actually, maybe I am justified in hating my selfish family members. All they do is take.
No happy ending to this post. You know, I actually prefer this. I'm either going to make it or die trying, bloodshot eyes, shitposting my last breath
submitted by /u/Diatery